Thursday, January 8, 2015

Pictures of a Bulldog Who Can't Even. Like, She Literally Cannot.

This dog just can't even. 

This dog is 100% over it - and these plastic tubs.

This dog seriously can't stand fleur de lys patterns on her towels.

This dog has absolutely had it with tiny hats. 

This dog simply cannot with these huge Victorian hats and hooker wigs. 

Like, seriously, can you just not? 

No, I cannot even without the hat.

This dog can't fucking believe her mother put her in diapers. 

"I am over foam fingers on Bronco Sunday." - This dog.

"...and New Years Eve. Seriously just stop." - This dog. 

This dog can't believe she is getting her picture taken right at this moment. She wishes it would just go away.

This dog has had it with Christmas photos...and that ridiculous elf necklace. WTF.

This dog isn't even close to handling the quality of this portrait of her - and having to take a picture next to it. OMG.

This dog could literally not give less of a fuck. 

Can this dog even? No, it cannot even. 

Can this dog from a chair? Nope, this dog can't literally anywhere. 

"Like, WTF are adults doing MOST of the time?" - This dog.

This dog is all, "Jeeves, the fuck?"

"Like for you are putting me on sideboards for display? Like the actual fuck." - This Dog. 

This dog wants to know why she isn't still in her bed while wrapped in this stupid peace sign blanket. 

This dog just wants it all to staaaaaaaaaaaaaaap. 

Like for real. Even at the groomers. Just staaaaaaaaaaaaapppppppppp!!!

Because, this dog just seriously can't.

Thursday, January 1, 2015

A Hunk and New Years Day Vegetable Soup

I hope everyone had an awesome New Years. If you were in bed by 8 or just now getting to bed (been there!) I hope you had a safe and awesome time!

I had a blast going to Fogo de Chao with my favorite juicy men group. You probably see a lot of them on my Facebook page and the one on the right going into those great rolls is my number ONE fan, Danny Frazier.

 If I post something and he hasn't liked it in less than 5 minutes, I start to get genuinely worried. I LOVE it. I also love that Facebook is the reason we met! I friended him thinking he was the sexiest thing I had ever seen. I quickly realized he was of the other sexual persuasion which made it great for us to become fast besties. After looking at the below picture and you thinking you have seen a sexier man, your point is now invalid. Check this OUT:

I can't. I seriously CANT.

Anyway, I think my post was about soup. Get a cold wash cloth and compose yourself. Better? Ok, onto the soup.

After eating like a wolverine the last few weeks with my birthday and Christmas and New Years, I need a serious food overhaul and I start today. In general, I eat really well.. I have to. My body is like a venus fly trap for fat and I can indulge a few times a week (if you follow my Facebook, you know I never miss my weekly yums) but the rest of the time, I keep it pretty clean.

One of my favorite things to have on hand is soup! I cleaned out the fridge today and there were a ton of vegetables in the fridge and freezer that I wanted to use. Soup is awesome for that - especially vegetable soup. I took three 32oz containers of good quality chicken broth (use vegetable too!) and started chopping and dumping..

I used corn, peas, carrots, celery, broccoli, fresh kale and spinach that needed to be used up, and a couple half used miscellaneous bags of frozen vegetables, some asparagus and zucchini that I steamed last week and a half used onion.. It was all stuff that was still good but stuff I wouldn't have used on its own and needed to move. Pour the broth ad all your vegetables in!

One of my secrets is using an immersion blender to blend about half of it. It makes it heartier and more flavorful because those vegetables get blended in there.

I also added a can of chopped tomatoes and tomato paste. You can really use whatever you have on hand but if you have these, they are an easy and yummy way to boost flavor.

My secret weapon it to put in a bottle of REALLY GOOD QUALITY pasta sauce that is JUST tomatoes and spices. I like Mario Batali tomato basil. It only has tomatoes and spices. YUM! 

Gilbert the cat watched the whole process and made sure it went smoothly.

It's been simmering a couple hours now. I added dried basil, garlic powder, oregano, and salt as well. Do it little by little to taste.

It's delicious with a sandwich, as a topping for chicken, with sausage stirred in, or a great afternoon snack. It's 85 calories a cup and this recipe makes a HUGE batch - around 20 cups. You can add cabbage, potatoes, beans, shredded chicken, leave out anything, it's so easy and a great way to clean out stuff that's been hanging around in the fridge. (It also freezes well!) I never worry about the calories of vegetable soup made of just veggies. I didn't gain weight on vegetable soup unless Taco Bell made a Crunchwrap Vegetable Soup Supreme or something. Then I would have to think twice.

So, with that, I wish you a wonderful and prosperous 2015. One of my goals is to blog more about staying healthy and finding great recipes (that are EASY!) to share with everyone. My goal is at least 4 blogs a month (so a weekly blog) and I am really excited to get back into it.

Oh and here is another picture of Danny - with his CAT! Drool city USA!


Thursday, December 18, 2014

Remember That Time You Had A Blog?

Well, this is embarrassing. It's really hard for me to start things and then fall short but I am realizing it has been almost 3 months since I have blogged. Blogging for me is super theraputic and I especially like to do it during Lent when my Facebook is deactivated. Maybe that is cheating a little but it's really fun to do during that time, I get really inspired and I have free time to do it, LOL.

It has been three months since I made an entry and in the last 3 months, life has been amazing, crazy, hard, sad, exciting, and pretty much anything else one would expect.

If you follow my Facebook page, you probably know the highlights but in an effort to check in, I would like to share some snapshots of the last couple months. Here are the top 10 things.

1) I helped save my buddy Patrick's bulldog - we rigged up my Grandpa's oxygen tank to fit him and he pulled through! He also spent the day with me at the doll shop. I cant. I just. I love him in his little oxygen goggle and he makes such a cute grumpy Frenchmen.

2) I flew to Chicago and earned my International Society of Appraisers certification. It has been a goal for a long time and I met some amazing friends! 

3) I went to Vegas overnight and filmed a show - which will air on February 19th, 2015 on the History Channel :)

4) I flew to Seattle with my Mom and did a great doll show for a couple days - I had a blast with my doll friends! 

5) Darrel ate a french fry sandwich.

6) Halloween as a gold digger!

7) Media frenzy with The Green Mile vs. Antique Row in November. It is ongoing and was really crazy, it's still going but really swept me away for most of the month. I will be on The Today Show in about 2 weeks - watch out for me!

8) Started and continued construction on my Broadway office. It was a lot of work and a true labor of love for myself and Eron who basically made it happen. The place was a complete mess - here is a picture the day we started. It has come a really long way. It's really different when you do the work yourself and spend your hard saved money on a project.

9) I found Eron's cat Gilbert on my bed one night like this:

10) Went on an amazing hike with my best friend and her husband and Eron. It was a really great Sunday. We explored a couple great placed to eat in Colorado Springs.

Thank you for sticking in with me folks, through times of lots of not so much posting. You will be seeing a lot of me during Lent :)


Monday, September 8, 2014

When Selfies Go Wrong

So I have been getting a lot of questions about my selfies. One of the most surprising questions came from my best friend Vicky. She asked honestly if I took the selfies while I was driving because they are usually in my car. The answer is NO, I NEVER take them when driving. Once in awhile I might take one at a stoplight but it's pretty embarrassing to do that and look over and have the car next to you be like with a thought bubble over their head, "You conceited bitch" so I usually take them in my car, BEFORE starting the car. Here is one I really like outside my condo last Sunday.

 I pulled over for this one.
 Some are better than others. It's so damn fun! It's kind of like playing a character.

Another question is "How do you photograph so well"'s really been a process figuring out the best angles and with every good selfie, you better believe I took at least 5-6 bad angles before choosing the angle I like. It's been hard lately not to get too repetitive. It's like, OK, we know you look cute with your head cocked. The head cocking is a good angle, but sometimes, it doesn't turn out so well. It kind of looks like I broke my neck.

So, if you ever need advice on if your selfie is good before posting, shoot it to me. I have taken some beasts before. It really does take practice. Totally go for it though because it's a lot of fun!!

Here are some examples of what NOT to do. I am just going to say, bathroom selfies are usually NEVER a good idea. Sometimes I will take them in my bathroom but for the love of God, don't take one while sitting on the toilet.

Or worse yet, after you have taken a dump.

Here is another example of a bad mirror use. #ohdeargod

Make it stop.

Guys, here is a tip. Don't take selfies is anyone is also peeing in the same room with you.

There is also a respectable time and place for selfies. How about maybe not your GRANDMA'S FUNERAL.

This is definitely Mom of the year.


Don't have your toddler take selfies of you.

 Or Grandma.

Also use common sense when Photoshopping.

If you are going to try and get a "girl next door" cute selfie, maybe put away the FOOT LONG BLACK DILDO on your nightstand.

And if you look like this, just stop taking selfies. Like never, ever, again.

Last but not least is one of my favorite selfies GONE RIGHT! Check out this OLD SCHOOL SELFIE!

What's your best angle or do you have some awesome crazy selfies to show me? I love them all!!